1924 - 2006

Death has been slowly reaching out its hand to my grandmother the past few days. She finally left to be with her Lord in the early morning hours. What a strange ordeal this has all been. I have never experienced knowing with certainty that someone was going to die. I am used to sudden, unexpected passings. No warning. I'm not sure which is worse. Except for the saying goodbye part, I am very grateful for that. And the release from her suffering for she has truly suffered the last number of years.

I have seen so much sadness and yet, beauty in the past number of hours. My 18 year old brother tenderly holding my grandmother's frail hand. My gruff, large uncles shedding tears over the tiny woman who mothered them for many years.

Thank goodness for Tink right now. He has been our ray of light. I did not have any reaction when my father told me the news this morning until I was rocking my son to sleep a few minutes ago. Somehow singing him a simple lullaby just released me from my numbness. There was so much emotion until I went to bed last night that I didn't think there was room for more. But of course there is much, much more to come. I haven't even seen my mother yet. That will not be good.

Please think of me and my family, the next while is going to be very trying.